Happy Friday!Wow where did this week go!!??? RL has handed me a can of whoop-ass this week, not been “on” much in SL. It is finally nice out here, and of course I get sun burned during Saturdays Cinco de Mayo parade. Damn thing lasted three hours and my neck and ears got a beating. It has tanned over now, as I spent a lot of time lubing my skin with Hempz & Aloe.
Been perving a lot of Flickr since I am not in world a lot this week, and I guess there must be some sort of pose & set event because I am starting to see a lot of the pre-fab sets and poses on Flickr. I do not think this is a bad thing at all, I rather find it pretty damn cool. To see different styles in the same scenery really is something to marvel. It would be cool to have a contest or event, where everyone poses and uses the same background, for like a charity or some holiday, I think that would be awesome. Sell the Set and pose and all proceeds go to charity. I might have to figure something out. The time I did spent in-world, I took down my old skybox, and set up a new one. Building and furnishing took a majority of my time. I took a few NSFW pictures as well, of course. So here is to a new chapter I guess. I still need to rez and make the “Game Room” soon.” However, I have not had the time. We will see about Saturday. I have a busy weekend ahead of me too, but next week will slow down, so I am excited about that. Super stoked for the Soundgarden concert tonight, about to go wild! Then back to more yard work and adulating, but at least I will have fun tonight. Posted some new pictures on Flickr, some naughty shots of my friends, some single shots of me… of course. So please check them out! I did not upload a lot this week, as I did not do many shots; my goal is to do at least 5-7 shoots next week. We will see, if you want to model let me know in world or send me an IM on Flickr. Have a great weekend bishes!! -ZW Flickr: https://www.flickr.com/photos/zoewillows/
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White-Trash ChicSo I have been favoring the poorly died white-trash/trailer-park chic look. I have always been a brunette but it is nice to change it up a bit, I sport the dark roots and all! It coincides with my new head, I decided to put a hold on my cute/sassy Catwa “Catya” head, in favor for the classically pretty, and elegant Lelutka “Cloe”. I am finding the transition very satisfying, I am in love with the head, and it takes such great shots. I am rocking the whole trailer park look, not just for the sleaziness of it... I have been spending a lot of time at the newly rezzed “:AFK:Red Light District Katoey Shemale F*** Market:”, I cannot help but feel naughty to be used there. It is strange I am generally used to bottoming during sexy time, but I was quite surprised when I put a peener on at the AFK place that nine times out of ten I am doing the naughty pushing. It has been fun, when I am not actually “AFK” been chatting up other “whores” and have gotten to know the owner. The whore to client ratio is all fuckered up, but it is still fun. I get IMs from the girls if I am working, usually giving me a play by play, and rating the length, and time of my exploits while in sleep. So you can come see me in world, if I am not 100% behind the avi I am there usually there on a bed. I am sure I will change my look here again soon but for the most part I am happy with it, and love playing the trashy role as of late. It has also given me great ideas for photo sets and themes. I would really like to do more with it, but I have to take one project at a time. Current Photo Project
Currently ConsumingSo to start off my blog with a bit of philosophy and negativity does not really make a good first impression, but the last 24 hours I have spent a lot of time in a deep pit of sadness. I need to move-on; I need to put this out in the universe.
Last night I lost my best friend. No she did not pass away, but it does feel like a loss of extraordinary measure. We have always had our difficulties; she is one of a select few I have completely blurred my SL and RL. I fell in love with her and eventually morphed that love into a deep friendship, because we could not sustain a healthy relationship in SL. We always had period of silence before to heal, we have fought hundreds of times and loved thousands. I am a stubborn bitch, and she can be very tenacious while upset. We were a chaos storm, even if the world is calm and bright. I am not without flaws…. I know my weakness. I tend to be brash, stubborn, and I seek attention, usually wanting to be at the center of said attention. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I give too many damn chances to those who do not deserve them. Sometimes I focus on others feelings more than my own, and last night made me realize that sometimes…. despite the truth, despite others feelings I need to stop giving these chances, and stop trying to reason and rationalize with those who cannot/refuse to help themselves. To intentionally hurt those you” love’ with words, that you know cut deep, and know have a history with said person SL & RL, then using it to harm a person is hateful, manipulative and not fair... To use someone’s “buttons” to harm them intentionally just out of anger or self-destruction is not healthy. I worry, for my friend…. Because she is driving all those away who care for her, and not with little jagged wedges but with atomic level words and actions that triggers a maelstrom of vitriol & hatefulness with whom she called ”Friends”. My friend has had these outbursts before, and has cut me deep in the past; she promised it would never happen again, so I gave her that chance. It just so happened the last chance was the most hurtful. “You will be reminded each day of what you could have had with me.” These words do not have the desired effect when she spoke them to me last night; they give me assurance and strength that I made the right choice. Her words will no longer ring in my ears. Because the true colors came out, and I am glad for the truth. I made my choice, to let her go romantically in fear of not being able to supports her needs. But her steadfast ways to prove what I was missing backfired on her.. I know what I am missing.. This pit in my stomach, the knot of fear and anger in my belly since this behavior began three weeks ago… it was gone this morning. Her words only proved my fears and it enlightens those around her that she can only blame for so long before taking responsibility of her instability and insecurity. I can no longer be the vessel for her suffering; I can no longer be the blame. I cannot spiral down her rabbit hole that she slowly hollows out until the bottom is breached. I can no longer sit idle as the abuse comes down relentlessly…. Not just on me, but those around her… So my “friend” please explore the unknown and take the risk… abandon the past, and your suffering. Put one foot in front, with small but progressive strides. Take responsibility for your actions, and your words. Open your eyes to the truth -it is not those around you creating a distance/disturbance, but your own self-destruction. May you find peace, for this is my last goodbye. Goodbye….. - Zoë “People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.” - Thich Nhat Hanh P.S. Next post will be happier and m rein theme of what I want for my new blog. --Cheers |
AuthorThis is the crossing of the wicked and divine. My subset of moods and expression. There are no themes here only my flights of fancy. Sensuality, sexuality, romance, fashion, to pornographic- I strive for nothing and express everything. Flickr SponsorsArchives
September 2017
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